Tag Archives: parents and recruiting

My Thoughts On High School Recruiting, The Parents and The Players

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Many high school student athletes screw up the college recruiting process, do you think that’s a true or a false statement?

In my opinion the statement is true!!

Because many student athletes are totally unsure what they should be doing when it comes to recruiting, all high school student athletes want to play division one sports and that right there clouds their judgment.

Student athletes should be focusing on a college program where they will be treated fairly, have an opportunity to play their sport and receive a college degree.

Being recruited is confusing for high school student athletes.  On one hand, everyone is in their ear telling them how good they are all the time.  On the other hand, it’s the reality of how good are you really?

The parents get caught up in the recruiting mixed messages of conversations because they want only the best for their sons and daughters.

There are so many players at the high school level who are extremely talented and sometimes they let that talent get in the way of academics.  There are some student athletes and parents who still believe to this day that if you are a superior athlete that somehow colleges are going to overlook their shortcomings academically.

The bottom line is if you do not have the grades, you’re going to end up in junior college in some far away town or a valuable employee at McDonald’s.

When I was going up I wanted to play basketball for theUniversityofMarylandbecause, at the time, that was one of the best basketball programs in the country and their games were televised all the time.

But no one was telling me how important taking the standardized tests were. I paid no attention to taking the SAT and I ended up going to junior college.  After junior college, I ended up going to West Virginia State College and after that I played basketball professionally inArgentina.

It worked out for me!

My advice to parents and student athletes is to get involved in the recruiting process at a minimum of 24 months before graduation from high school.  This will save you a lot of time, frustration, aggravation, humiliation and, most importantly, disappointment with the college recruiting process.

Recruiting can be a very humbling experience!

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Parents Should Take a Backseat in the College Recruiting Process

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There are parents who believe that they are the ones being recruited by college programs.  Some parents feel they lost something years ago and want to recapture it again by being overly involved in the college recruiting process.

As a college recruiter, I spent many hours on the phone talking with parents and most of them believe that they should be in control.

Because these parents were paying me, I kind of went along with it to a certain degree.  I kinda told them it was OK to do certain things when it came to them and their involvement with college coaches.  But the truth is that college programs would rather deal with the student athlete 99.9% of the time and not talk to the parents at all if possible.

When you really think about it, it’s the student athletes who are going to college to play sports, not the parents. Sometimes the parents can get in the way and this could be a major turn off to college coaches.

I do believe parents should take part in assisting throughout the college recruiting process.  There are things that parents can do that high school student athletes are not capable of doing. Mailing DVD’s is going to cost money and even getting the DVD’s produced cost money; that can be the parent’s responsibility along with the crafting of an email or handwritten letter.  Parents can be a valuable asset throughout the college recruiting process because of their years of experience and wisdom.

We all know parents want the best for their kids and even when it comes to choosing the right college program.  Parents understand what it means to receive an all expenses-paid college education.  I believe this is why parents sometimes are overly involved during the college recruiting process-they truly understand by picking the right college for their kids could have a huge lifelong positive affect on the rest of their lives.

When a college coach does finally call your house and your son or daughter is not home and you happen to take the call just take a message from that coach. Be very cordial but also be very quick with your response.  If you’re on the phone with a coach longer than 2 minutes then you’re doing something wrong.  If the coach asks you a question that’s different, answer the question then maybe ask a good follow-up question and then get off the phone.  The last thing a college coach wants to do is to spend a bunch of unnecessary time talking to a parent and having to explain to that parent anything about recruiting.

Final thoughts: The college recruiting process is not easy and one thing I know that is true is many parents are willing to do whatever it takes to see that their child is a success.  With that being said, there are some simple unwritten rules that parents should go by.  Basically, one thing that parents should understand is to not be pushy and not to be out front and overly involved in every situation as it relates to recruiting and dealing with the college coaches.

Parents can have an active role in the process of getting exposure for their son or daughter who is looking to play college athletics. It is important because the parents are the ones who have been investing dollars into their student athlete’s athletic future and probably will continue to do so.

The bottom line in all of this recruiting business is the parents need to understand to be smart and everything will work out.

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Four Things I Dislike About Parents Of High School Student Athletes

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Parents have high expectations when it comes to the college recruiting process especially when they’re spending their own money.

I’ve dealt with a lot parents as a college recruiter and many feel that if they can put some money on it the college recruiting process will work exactly how they want it to work. Because of that mindset, many parents of high school athletes have problems and I thought I would develop a list of 10 things I dislike about parents in the college recruiting process.

Ridiculous expectations when it comes to playing time. I’ve attended many high school sporting events and there have been times where I’m sitting there next to some out of control parent who’s complaining about how their kid is not getting enough playing time.  Parents like that find every excuse in the world to find fault with the high school coach. These knucklehead parents will complain about the style of play, the outcome of the game or anything else that seems, in their opinion, wrong.  This is why many college programs don’t want to have anything to do with parents at all.

Parents tell many lies. The college recruiting process sometimes comes down to stretching the truth. In all the years that I’ve been a college recruiter, I have heard some of the strangest lies coming of the mouths of parents.  Parents will tell me or even college coaches that their son who plays basketball is 6’4 and 212 pounds. When more investigation is done, we find out that the kid is only 6’1 and 190 pounds.  Stretching the truth about the GPA is also a problem but many parents do not have a problem with falsifying information because they think it will give their kid an advantage with college coaches.

Parents not knowing anything about the recruiting process. When it comes to the college recruiting process, a huge percentage of parents know absolutely nothing about how the college recruiting process works and many parents don’t care.  Parents would rather let the high school coach be totally responsible for getting their kid recruited for college programs.  If parents knew more about the college recruiting process they could better assist their student athlete and assist with all the many details that are involved in the college recruiting process.

Parents should not talk to college coaches. Parents should be involved in the college recruiting process but there should be limits.  Some parents believe that they are the ones who are being recruited by college programs so therefore, they want to be the ones to place calls to college coaches, take phone calls from college coaches and dominate the conversation with college coaches.  College coaches are only interested in the student athletes, not having some long, boring conversation with the parents.

Final thoughts: I truly believe parents want the best for their kids when it comes to going from high school athlete to college athlete.  But parents need to take the time to understand the college recruiting process and stop blaming others for their lack of participation.  The college recruiting process is not easy and, for the most part, it makes absolutely no sense which is why all parties who are involved in the process need to begin the college recruiting process very early.  Give yourself enough time to try and make sense of what’s going on.  Understand how to gain the exposure, understand how to build a strong list of college programs and also understand that things may not always go your way.

Why some parents of high school athletes almost always make me sick

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The parents of high school athletes have a great deal of passion for their sons and daughters who are very talented student athletes.

I know the parents are the ones who speak up for their kids, spend money on their kids, and they do almost everything for their kids when it comes to sports and college recruiting.

Many of these parents, if you let them, will get on your last nerve by being aggravating, irritating and just plain stupid.

For a very long time I was a college recruiter and I spoke to hundreds of parents each and every year about the college recruiting process.  Many of these parents were crazy and confused about how the college recruiting process should work for them, not about how the college recruiting process should work.

I can truly see why many college coaches do not want to have anything to do with parents.

Every parent that I’ve ever talked to about the college recruiting process always had some sort of complaint.  These parents were complaining about how bad the high school coach was or how recruiting was going so terrible for their son or daughter, who they felt should be getting scholarship offers every single day.

When I try to offer solutions to these parents they did not want to hear anything I had to say.

If another parent was doing something different with the college recruiting process it sometimes pissed off other parents.  If a particular situation was going differently from one parent to the next, then you just had total college recruiting confusion amongst these parents.

Now don’t get me wrong, there are a huge number of parents out there who are great and who totally understand the college recruiting process.

Many parents have taken the time to look into what the college recruiting process is all about.

These parents for me were always easy to work with because I could talk to them in a calm and intelligent manner and they would understand what I was saying without becoming angry or frustrated.

The college recruiting process, for all who are involved with it, really makes absolutely no sense but my best advice would be to start the process as early as possible just so you could have a fighting chance of gaining some type of advantage.

I understand what parents want because they have invested a lot of money and time into their kid’s athletic and educational futures.  When these parents don’t see a return on that investment, then this is when they start to lose their minds and drive everyone crazy.